hey. hah. it's been awhile since i last blogged about my life.. because of more reasons than one.

this week has been.. alright? ups and downs, very much the usual life i have. been working and neglecting God =X i know it's not good to do so, and i'm trying not to also =X

anyway.. to the main point of today's post, God. I don't know what to say.. i guess words are harder to describe what has happened. I was angry with God (subconsciously) for a certain thing that happened this week. and i conveniently told him "leave me alone, i need my own space"

does that happen to you all? sometimes, we tell God.. i'm too drained to listen to wht you wanna tell me. or perhaps, i dont think i'm ready to accept your will in my life.

it happens for me at times.. and normally there's only one reason why i behave that way. the reason is, i'm trying to run away from my problems and from God (because he wants to help me solve the problems, how am i supposed to do tt if i dont even want to face it?)

so alright.. it went on for about the whole week. until today, i told myself i dont wanna try and act strong alr. it's too much for me to handle. and as i sat down to talk it out with God, tears came down (as usual) and i was relieved of what i'm going through.

honestly, i dont know why i'm blogging about this.. but i guess it serves as a reminder for myself, that God doesnt look down on you if you admit your feelings. neither will he judge you for what you have done. i guess, that's smth else about God i cannot understand. cos sometimes, it seems too good to be true.

my point is.. God is waiting for you, all the time. no matter what you've done.. he is waiting for you to come back to him. and i'm truly thankful for that.. His grace is sufficient for you, and his strength is made perfect in weaknesses. (amen)

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update no.2

i just realised that i am getting too used to working life.. 3 signs to it.

1) i'm waking up at 7.30/8/8.15 am for no reason today

2) i saw the time on my phone at 18.31 & my reaction was "WORK IS OVER" but guess wht, it's a saturday =X

3) i look at decimals (eg. 0.24) & my reflex action was to put a tick next to the number. -_-